Supplies! Jon Hillenbrand, March 1, 2011October 17, 2019 I don’t squeeze my toothpaste tube up from the bottom the way everyone else does because I like there to be some surprises in my life. Like, “Hey, there’s a whole ‘nother glob of extra toothpaste over here in this part! Just when I thought I was running out!” Unfortunately, the most recent surprises in my life aren’t as pleasant. Recently I was asked to photograph a check presentation at the Chicago Auto Show. Seemed like a boring way to attend the CAS, but then I got a nice surprise that I was getting to go on Media Day! No crowds, no strollers, free entry, woo hoo! But then I had another surprise. The free parking that I found wasn’t allowed for CAS attendees. So for the two or so hours that I was there, I was worried that I would come back to an empty space as Nelson drove by and yelled, “Haw haw!” But surprise! My car was still there! The beauty of the auto show masks the armies of tow trucks waiting outside to remove the crappy cars you already own Other recent surprises have been equally mixed. I discovered a cabinet in my kitchen that I hadn’t opened in like a year (I don’t cook much). I looked inside and found candlesticks, wine glasses and fabric napkins. Oooh la la, how romantic. And surprise! There’s that missing pillow case you gave up on mixed in with the napkins. Later, I went to make a sandwich. Surprise! Half the bread you left out has been eaten by something. Remember that annoying rattling plastic sound you heard the other night when you were at the computer? Yeah, that was some animal in the kitchen ten feet away from you. Freeloading mouse can't get enough of my gourmet bread Guessing it’s a mouse, and feeling smarter than the old saying, “You can’t make a better mouse trap,” I designed my own mouse trap: Note the ingenious and largely redundant suspended "second bait" It had to be non-lethal because what the heck, it’s just trying to get some food. The next day, however, I discovered that the bait that I put out wasn’t up to the mouse’s standards. My friend Tera suggested that I bait it with bread since it seemed to be craving carbs, as if the mouse were preparing for some mouse marathon. Probably a good idea, but surprise, surprise, I disassembled the trap and decided to just not leave bread out anymore figuring that the mouse will move on. Surprise, I can hear it digging at the base moulding from the inside of the walls now. Creepy. Photography Thoughts babysittingcar prisoncarschildrendrawingphotographytowing
Photography Sweet as a field of grass June 13, 2007October 17, 2019 Life is Beautiful, but it’s complicated. I looked up the song title “Life is Beautiful” today at Barnes and Noble, and 60 entries came up with that as the song title! 60! It’s plagiarism gone amok! And, of course, the version by Vega4 wasn’t listed, which was the only version… Read More
Photography Universal Tooth August 10, 2010October 17, 2019 Debating the details of someone’s core beliefs is an entertaining yet usually pointless endeavour; but let slip the dogs of war, I say. I once argued with a girl for what felt like two hours about the existence of Universal Truth, she on the, “it obviously exists,” side and me on the, “you can never prove it,”… Read More
Photography Winning and competition October 28, 2008October 17, 2019 Every step we take is either closer to or further from the land of the living. The problem is, we never know which direction we are heading in until we get there. These words from Jarhead are a good way of indicating the importance of winning. As a kid, I… Read More